I was raised in a Christian denomination known for taking bold, loud stands – religiously, socially, politically. I raised in a family that believed in the purity culture, that didn’t own a television, listen to secular music, drink alcohol, or say “gosh.” In other words, there was a lot of CONTROL.
Even as a kid I could see that Jesus in the Bible wasn’t like that. The dudes that seriously didn’t like Jesus? He either told them the truth and walked away, or told them the truth in a parable they didn’t understand, then walked away. He confronted, but he didn’t control anyone.
So I never understood why it was so important in my childhood denomination to WIN in such a way that they CONTROLLED the conversation.
As an adult, I’ve found that a religious spirit of control picked up in my past has kept some of its talons in me. I get anxious when people aren’t “doing it right.” I have SO much good advice (don’t we all), but the more I listen to Holy Spirit, the more he tells me shut my mouth.
I ask Jesus, “Why do I know this stuff if I’m not supposed to say it?”
Jesus says, “None ya business.”
I was reading in Matthew 13 yesterday looking for answers and I think I found – for myself – how to start ousting the spirit of control I hate so much. “The Kingdom of Heaven is like leaven, which a woman took and hid inside three measures of flour, until the whole thing was leavened.” Then, because sometimes I read scripture pages bottom-to-top, “The Kingdom of Heaven is like a grain of mustard seed, which someone took and sowed in his field. It’s the smallest of all the seeds, but when it grows, it turns in the biggest of all the shrubs. It becomes a tree, and the birds in the sky can then come and nest in its branches.”
I heard Holy Spirit tell me that the words he gives me to say will be like leaven, or like a mustard seed. Nothing more is needed, because when Jesus gives me Kingdom words, a few dribbles of living water is worth more than an ocean of religious advice – however it is meant.
Today I continued a previous reading in Acts 6, and came to the well-known story of Stephen. He was filled with grace and power and performed great signs and wonders among the people. Those that stood up and disputed with him – that plotted to kill him – could not, no matter how they tried – “resist the wisdom and the spirit with which he spoke.” (verse 10)
We know that Stephen was martyred for his faith after a magnificent outpouring of Kingdom leavening into the ears of his accusers. That he saw Heaven open up and Jesus seated at Father’s right hand before he was martyred…
…and that a young man named Saul looked on and saw it all. I’d say a mustard seed landed.
And I ask myself, what does a win really look like in the Kingdom of Heaven? What does a loss really look like? Politically, socially, religiously?
Spirit of control… Goodbye.
As for me, I will build the Kingdom.
