Author: theparacleteshammer

Well, the Mesmerizing Spirit is finally beginning to be stripped back from the American culture.
And thank G-d.  It’s about time this crap got exposed, even if it is not pretty.
The garbage that is now getting exposed, started years ago, and we need to repent of it and call it what it is.  Sin.
Yes, America, this is what it looks like when we pray for the Mesmerizing Spirit to be broken off of a nation.
Some too-close friends of mine were sexually molested by pastors and those in positions of leadership.
This one issue is why I never returned to the town where I grew up.
Churches fired members of their congregation from paid positions of leadership because it would ruin their reputations.
Congregations stood by their pastors and against the victims out of loyalty, or perhaps out of fear of the consequences of what would happen if they did expose their leaders.
And the list goes on.
And it is not just women, but men as well.
Another sad thing, is that people with celebrity status are jumping on the bandwagon of the #MeToo movement.
Now, allow me to differentiate something.
I didn’t express it well with one of my co-bloggers.  Honestly, I was stupid and brash  and too quick with my comments.  I said I had some reservations about the #MeToo movement. But I do not.  Rather, now that I have had a chance to ponder my reservations with the #MeToo hashtag, I have a better way to express it.
There appear to be two groups that connect with #MeToo.  First, the very real victims.  These are the smoldering wicks and the bruised reeds that the Father of Lights promised He would never snuff out nor break.  We need to advocate for them.
And there is the movement that is comprised of those with celebrity status that would seek to use the victims…
They would seek to use the victims for their own gain.
They would also seek to use their own abnormally large platforms that was granted them by the powers-that-be in this perverse culture, for political advancement.  To advance an agenda that does not fix the problem.
They would seek to insert discussion about how the news media is righteous and the current political structure on one side of the aisle is bad.   This behavior is hypocritical and does not fix the problem.   This behavior proceeds from a false motive.
It confuses the care of the victims with agendas that are tangents to the heart of the problem.
The trouble is, church, we are all culpable for the mess in which we find ourselves.
And as one called to pastor I have one thing to say.
In the words of my co-blogger, Amy Dudley:

Transparency is a concept that leaves us paralyzed at the thought that we will be found out and then everyone will know how fucked up and broken we really are.

Yes, I included that because this is precisely where many of us have been left…
In a place of complete disarray…
Where what was sacred was made profane, by our own sins of omission…
Of neglecting to protect those dear to us.
My brother, to start.  Precious Exhorter that he is.  Precious, world-changing man of G-d, who found his courage in prison, and found a new life in the Great Plains.
And, in the words of Amy Dudley, what kept us silent?

“Two Words:  Shame. Fear.”

My brother’s shame became my fear.  Fear that paralyzed me from moving beyond places where he failed.
And I burdern-bore for him, for Y. E. A. R. S..
And now, all these years later, we are on a massive hunt for dignity for the shame that bound so many of our brothers and sisters.
Dignity is what breaks and displaces shame, not honor.
And we are on a massive hunt for Life, which breaks the spirit of Jealousy, and the rage of the Edomites.
And Dominion, that breaks the Victim Spirit, and the Babylonian idolatry that keeps us powerless before the Spirit of Antichrist.
And Honor…
Honor that comes from the Holy Spirit…
A RABBIT TRAIL
Let me get you a tiny little lesson on the nature of the Holy Spirit here.  Below is Romans 12:6-8 in the Greek. The original. Note the segment at the beginning verse 8 that is highlighted in blue.
6 ἔχοντες δὲ χαρίσματα κατὰ τὴν χάριν τὴν δοθεῖσαν ἡμῖν διάφορα, εἴτε προφητείαν κατὰ τὴν ἀναλογίαν τῆς πίστεως,
7 εἴτε διακονίαν ἐν τῇ διακονίᾳ, εἴτε ὁ διδάσκων ἐν τῇ διδασκαλίᾳ,
8 εἴτε ὁ παρακαλῶν ἐν τῇ παρακλήσει, ὁ μεταδιδοὺς ἐν ἁπλότητι, ὁ προϊστάμενος ἐν σπουδῇ, ὁ ἐλεῶν ἐν ἱλαρότητι.
That segment in the Greek reads, “and the Exhorter in his Exhorting” The Greek word here that is used to translate the fourth Redemptive Gift is parakleton “the one who comes alongside”.
Another form of that word occurs in John 14:16:
16 κἀγὼ ἐρωτήσω τὸν πατέρα καὶ ἄλλον παράκλητον δώσει ὑμῖν ἵνα μεθ᾽ ὑμῶν εἰς τὸν αἰῶνα ᾖ,
The text reads “and I will ask/pray to/beseech the Father and another paraclete/comforter/helper/exhorter he will give to you so that with you into the age he might be.”
So, the L-rd gives us an Exhorter as our counselor.
He gives us an emotional, tender-hearted, social, affectionate, personable, not-anti-social, loving, kind, generous-with-his-time and whole Exhorter to confide in.
EXHORTERS, ARE YOU CATCHING THIS?!  IF THE HOLY SPIRIT IS AN EXHORTER, AND THAT IS CENTRAL TO THE NATURE OF G-D, WHAT DOES THAT SAY ABOUT YOU????  YOU ARE A CHIP OFF OF THE OLD BLOCK!
I digress.
BACK ON THE TOPIC
So Honor comes from the Holy Spirit…
That Honor and ability to see things as they really are, both the good and the bad, breaks the power of the mesmerizing spirit,
It destroys the belief that we have to return to Mizraim, the land of Egypt, to be Pharaoh’s slaves and build his cities with whips at our backs.
And Honor comes with Life and Dominion.  These are gifts that come as the members of the Trinity each minister to our spirits.
And that ministry heals, makes whole, softens hearts, breaks the power of death, gives dignity, and breaks the powerlessness.
So, as a pastor, I say, this attitude of protecting the rep of your church at the cost of hurting other people, can ultimately lead to the destruction of your rep.
If you FUBAR the life of someone and then discard them because their presence would ruin your reputation, it shows where you have gone.  You have allowed a mesmerizing spirit to steal in, unnoticed, and rob your church of not only its life, but also the one thing–your reputation and image–that you sought to protect.
And if you zoomed in on the five-letter acronym in the preceding paragraph, because you know what it stands for, and made much of it, then you missed the point of this post, and of Amy’s post.
THE GRIT OF THE SITUATION
Grit is the stubborn texture of the situation.  The part of the road that defines it.  It is made up of integrity or its lack.
Here is the bottom line, each of you local churches.
Your precious reputation is in His hands.  He does with it what he will.  It is not your job to protect your reputation.  That belongs to Him.  If He wrecks your reputation as He did with Elijah in response to the prophet’s stubbornness, who stayed with a widow for months, that is His responsiblity.
If He builds your reputation, then that is both His responsibility to care for it, and your responsibility to steward it.
Some of you have made an idol of your church’s reputation.  Some of you have made much of what your church’s brand is in the community.  You need to quit that.  It is Father’s job to make or break that reputation.
And it is your job to keep your grubby mitts offa someone who is not your wife, men, or your husband, ladies.
And with idols, Father has been known to command us to smash those.
Matthew 16:18 does not say you will build the church.  It says Jesus will Himself build His church.  Acts says, that L-rd added daily those who were being saved.  It does not say the apostles added anything.  They provided a good landing pad for the L-rd’s presence.
You are responsible to protect those who are harassed and helpless in your body among you.  You are charged by the Father of Lights in the law with three commands to love.
You shall love the L-rd your G-d with all of your heart, soul, and might.
Deuteronomy 6:5
You shall love your neighbor as yourself.  Leviticus 19:18
And the third “you shall love” in the Tanakh, which is rarely preached on.

“You shall treat the stranger who sojourns with you as the native among you, and you shall love him as yourself, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt: I am the LORD your God.”  Leviticus 19:34

This third command to love was the answer to the self-justified lawyer’s question:
“Who is my neighbor?” (Luke 10:29)
You shall love the very one you hate, dear Jewish Torah expert.  You shall love the one you think is going to destroy your reputation, church.  That “bastard” Samaritan.
So, in finishing, protect the flock, and do not abuse the flock, and leave the reaping of your reputation and brand in the community to Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
Do it, without excuses.
#TimesUp

I am working through several issues today.
I know one person that I can confidently say is a legit fivefold prophet.  He is someone that talks to G-d on a regular basis, and G-d talks back.  He lives in the great state of Massachusetts, and has a stubborn streak of crankiness when it comes to ignorance of basic Scriptural understanding.  But he is a close friend and someone I can call, not just to talk about what word he has, but just to talk about how he is doing.  He is a father in the faith, and I have few of those.
He has an odd sense of humor.  And, because of him, I have a number of catchphrases that are very prophety.
And my sense of humor, if it can’t be odd enough, was added to in oddness from him.
His name is Jeff Sickler.  And he is precious, and more precious to connect with on a regular basis.
Today I was in the process of checking some things after a phone call, and he rang me earlier today with a prayer request.  Later today, he rang me again…
With the following, unprovoked lead-in question…
Jeff asked, “Have you been getting bored with cooking?”
I replied,”How do you mean, Jeff?”
(This was my way of stonewalling, because I was indeed feeling like cooking was becoming a chore.)
“Like, when you used to cook, you enjoyed it, but recently in the last few weeks, it has become more of a chore and you have seen it as humdrum.”
I replied that I had never shared this with anyone, but it was in fact true.  And then I asked:
“How did you know this, Jeff?”
“G-d told me.”
Typical Jeff.
And then he expanded.
“Actually, He has been talking to me about this several times, and told me to give you a call and pray for you.”
And so he started praying.
And as he started praying, I started thinking, “chicken, I need chicken.”
Grab chicken, and then put some oil in a pan, and what else?  Garlic.  Get a clove and press that.
And one at a time, the ingredients come.
And grab those dried cayenne peppers on my counter and grind them up.
Honey
Chicken starts sautéing, and then, I hunt for carrots.. Found them. slice them in the processor.
And dump the carrots in with the chicken and garlic, and honey and add a nice big pinch of cayenne and some black pepper.
Then…it needs more salt…no not salt…something else…nutty….soy sauce.
And didn’t we have some leftover rice in the fridge.  Yes, yes we did.
And boom.
Out it comes.  My spirit started cooking.  And the fragrance went pow!
So, I recognize that my spirit can cook, and make something insanely spicy that all of me really enjoys.
And I needed it, because after I finished cooking, I saw a comment on my Facebook wall in response to my punny comment that “Seatac is better than hardtac”.  The author said to me that she didn’t know what it meant. I explained that it was a veiled reference to the conference I will be attending in February, and what the play on words was, by explaining hardtack.
And she replied that it I was excited about the conference in SeaTac.
And I said, I was excited to meet people that I had never met before.
And then I said it….
“How can I miss someone I never met before?”
And then I realized..I know the answer to that question.
I have two answers to that question, and both have hit nerves for me.  I have at least one or two nerves that dwell with the Lamb, permanently, that I have never yet met.
And I recognize this as my birthday comes up.  I am missing some things that are precious to me.
New Treasures.
And like any scribe of the kingdom, I have Treasures….
Old…
And New…….

The last post on Prophets and Exhorters was something I needed to get out.
For whatever reason, I personally am drawn to Exhorters, to be life-giving to them, and to bring them dignity.  I have a lot to say about them.  There is much to celebrate about them.
Okay, so after that last post, here are some other ideas about my unique design, and then about Exhorters, Prophets, and the dynamic between them.
MY DESIGN
I have been working through this concept of what my Redemptive Gift is for some time.
Many people have given their opinions. I am fine with that input.
Eventually, one of these will emerge as the stronger.
With apologies to Adam Esbenshade, Sandy Landry, and John Mosley for having all sorts of conversations about this topic.
What I do know:
1) I love transformation.  I love seeing people come to a place of understanding.
2) I love providing a complete package of understanding. I don’t like critical details to be missing from helping people understand the path they are on and the path that Father intends for them. I hunt for the missing piece to solve some sort of Rubik’s Cube.
3) This is where my deep research of Scripture and love of the languages come in handy.  I add what is missing. I fill out detail. I add color.  I don’t just create skeleton frameworks. I create fuller pictures.
4) I am designed to not only work with land, but also to help others work with the land.
5) I am relational in part. I understand principles and the idea of blessing, and I love to bless others.
6) I am a wordsmith. I write intensively.
7) I enjoy being in motion.
8) I think in terms of principles, and, increasingly, I love to solve problems.
9) I am pretty much a what-you-see-is-what-you-get kind of person.  If you want to know what I think, you ask.  Now, I am capable of being kind and relational because I often times am pretty good at gauging what people are going to be able to handle.
10) I am very very very emotional.
11) I am also trusting to a fault.
WHICH GIFT?
I found out that my last post was shared in some unusual places without my knowledge. I know that in that post I had confessed that there was a possibility that I might be an Exhorter, and in some place I had gone so far as to say I had received some affirmation as an Exhorter.
There are some of you that said, “but wait, I thought he said he was a Prophet at one point”.
Others have said, “finally he admitted the truth!”
Still others have said,”more confusion”.
And others might also have said,”wounding.”
And others have asked questions about what I meant by Exhorters backstabbing Prophets.
So, in order to attempt to clear up confusion, let me give you a series of thoughts here.
MY EXHORTER CONTEXT
First of all, when many of you see the Exhorter come out of me, I can explain several factors that might explain some of my Exhorter-esque behavior without calling me a Redemptive Gift Exhorter.
First of all, I was raised on Exhorter land.
I am the baby in the family, which leaves an Exhorter imprint.
My brother is a card-carrying, vintage Exhorter. He is the guy who sneezes and three people get saved.
A spiritually significant ex-pastor of mine (a spirotual father of mine), is an Exhorter.
And several influential people in my life are Exhorters.
Me, I am not so sure I am an Exhorter in my hardwiring. I have for the last several years leaned more strongly toward Prophet than Exhorter.
But there are many ways in which I interact like an Exhorter.
So, we are on this journey together, and I am well with the conversation, and wherever it ends up, I will be satisfied with the outcome.
MY EXHORTER-ISH BEHAVIORS
I won’t rehash the traditional childhood stories of dislike and being unpopular, but I will say I was not socially active until I got to college.
And then BAM!
In two weeks I went from being unknown to being known by at least 80 percent of the people on campus. That one dynamic never changed in the four years I was there in college, though a close-knit circle of friends did eventually coalesce.
The draw of others to me was instantaneous, virtually. I did not blend in whatever. I still don’t.
And I grew up seeing the worst side of the Exhorter gift.
So, here is what I said to myself when I saw repeated expressions of the worst of that gift.
“I absolutely refuse to engage in this behavior.  No control, no manipulation, no backstabbing of others. Period.”
Now, let me frame the above three phrases, because I have said a lot about the negative side of the Exhorter.
The Redemptive Gifts, in their carnal manifestations each have their own negative side, and each is a different flavor:
Prophet:  Fracturing Relationships over an ideological issue.
Servant: Victim mentality with peace at any cost
Teacher: Doing everything except the one thing they have been told to do. Behaving in a predatory fashion (Amalekites).
Exhorter: Control of people by manipulating elements related to cohesive relationships.
Giver: Control of situations to yield outcomes that are favorable to them
Ruler: Exploitation in order to grow their systems
Mercy: Stubbornness and Sexual Impurity
And yes, I could write a goodly article about each, so please do not think that my pointing out the Exhorter’s issues is because I have a vendetta against Exhorters.
I saw some Exhorters use their charisma to network and then use their networked influence with others to control. And it never ended well.
Now let me qualify that statement:  Those Exhorters that engaged in this sort of behavior did so for one of at least two reasons:
1) they had not yielded their gift to the L-rd.
2) they had embraced some perception in their lives that was a not similar to reality.
On the other hand, I have seen Exhorters that used their gifts, in the context of a surrendered life to the L-rd, to accomplish great things, communicate complex spiritual truths in language the soul can understand, and create communities with the flick of a wrist.  I have detailed some of those very positive attributes in previous posts.
So, given these qualifiers, let me flesh out a couple of particular dynamics.
PRESENTATION
Exhorters are given to the concept of presentation.
On the one hand, in a healthy form of this expression, are those who dress with an eye to color, a well-coordinated outfit, and plenty of sparkle or a sharpness in their dress, or some capacity to work well with words of mannerisms so as to foster an space where community is easy to form.  They love color, sparkle, bling, jewelry, gemstones, and this is not a superficial facet of their hardwiring.  They use these affinities to help polish the image they put forward for others to enjoy.
On the other hand, in the unhealthy form of presentation in either:
1) an Exhorter church or organization
2) a church or organization in an Exhorter community
3) a church or organization that occupies the former property once owned by an Exhorter organization
The dynamic of presentation can (not a guarantee that it does, but an acknowledgement that it can) manifest in some unhealthy dynamics.
For example, I have a friend who was molested in an Exhorter church for which he worked. The church responded by firing the perpetrator of the abuse, and then responded by firing this friend. They did so in order to protect their reputation.
This is a negative manifestation of that dynamic of presentation. When the Exhorter engages in covert, hurtful behaviors in order to maintain a certain appearance before others, then the image may be maintained for a while, but it can hurt those who suffer from those hurtful behaviors.
The presentation dynamic is not meant to engage in malicious intent in order to protect reputation. Rather, it is designed to help express one thing: the concepts of the spirit in the language and package of the soul.
There is a language that the Spirit speaks to our human spirits, and Exhorters, as the master communicators are designed to make it easy for us to understand those complex realities.
COMMUNICATION
Exhorters are the master communicators, crafting words and phrases in such a way that makes the truth they communicate easy to digest for the largest number of people.
The negative manifestation comes out when they relying on this quality to influence people without first submitting it to Almighty G-d leads to the next issue.
For example, I belonged to a church pastored by an Exhorter in a particular city where I went to college.  This church believed it exercised spiritual authority over the local university in the city, where I and some close friends attended.
However, a group of us students were led to start praying for that college without first running it by the pastor of this church.  We were effective in praying, and the L-rd gave us extensive spiritual authority over the campus.  This pastor responded with the belief that the university was his spiritual domain, so he scheduled a meeting with those of us who led this group, and asked us to consider submitting the prayer group to his authority and oversight.  The leader of the group said he would pray about it.  School then broke that week for Christmas Vacation, and while at home, the leader heard from the L-rd not to put the group under that pastor’s authority. However, before he could return to give that answer to the pastor, the following week, I attended church there, and at some point during the sermon, the pastor slandered us from the pulpit, calling us “kids who were shooting at principalities with water pistols”.  I had to recover from that, because I could not believe what I had heard.  It was very surreal.  We had now become marked men.  Even when the leader of the prayer ministry returned, without knowledge that this had happened while he was away, he sought the pastor out to give him the answer he had heard from the L-rd, but the pastor’s wife told him that he was not welcome.  This leader of our prayer ministry was a Redemptive Gift Prophet.
And this is precisely what happens in the worst of the Exhorter, when their gift of communication goes awry.  People get hurt.
And in my case, I was friends with both this pastor, and the leader of this prayer ministry, and I got caught in the crossfire with divided loyalties.  Do I support my friend who was clearly just doing what he was called to do, or do I submit to my pastor, who should have been high-functioning but shot off at the mouth?
In the end, I went with my friend, though I never once called the pastor out or slandered him with a railing accusation.
Those days were some of the hardest in my life, because they began a season of warfare that was draining and left me with very little resources.  They left us with a number of curses that were in effect from the moment we ran afoul of the church in 2002, until we uncovered and broke those curses about a year ago.
So, in summary, I have seen a number of instances of the result when an Exhorter does not submit their gift to G-d’s use, and the result is very much destructive.  So, when I talk about Exhorters backstabbing Prophets, I think of this example, among others, and I also think of Exhorters who are unsubmitted to Christ as far as their gift is concerned.
I am not talking about the dozens of gifted men and women I know who have paid the price, willingly or unwillingly, embraced the pain, and submitted their gift, and flow in it in a healthy fashion.
THE BACKSTABBING ISSUE
I have seen the Prophet Exhorter Relationship go vastly sideways, and to directly address the concept of the Exhorter capacity to backstab, let me frame it the other way around.  A Prophet never stabs you in the back, rather when they get out of control, they stab you in the face, head-on, and leave you bleeding.
So, in the very worst manifestation, when an Exhorter like my ex-pastor is not yielded in their gift to the L-rd, there can be the added pitfall of talking about a person or group, which can lead to talking badly about that person or group, which can further lead–because of their capacity to influence large groups of people–to getting buy-in and agreement from a large group that says “yes” to the vision the carnal or low-functioning Exhorter has given to them.
Now, I have seen this happen a number of times, and while it does happen, let me also be the first to admit that I do not believe it to be the majority of cases.  And let me also be the first to say that it is not an inevitability, but rather a potential problem.
If it applies to you then work at dealing with it, and if not, then disregard.
PROPHET PITFALLS
Now, on the other hand, let’s talk about Prophets.  Black and white, ideological, understand principles, have an opinion about everything, volcanic emotions, and often times, in their low-level function, they are going to destroy relationships in order to hold onto a principle or a belief.  And let’s not forget the tunnel vision that can happen.
I have seen these Prophets destroy relationships that were G-d-ordained before their times due to cynicism.  I have destroyed some of those relationships myself.
Further, there are times that, because of the damage I have seen church leadership engage in, I have grown leery of the behavior of many in leadership, because of the way in which they have treated friends and family.
I have friends who have left the local church due to wounding by leadership.  They are in a position of living in the mindset of Life After Church because they haven’t found local churches that are truly safe places.
I think the fact that the church has grown into an unsafe place is a disgrace and a blot on the local church.  I think the fact that sniping happens in the local church is a disgrace.  I am unsettled that our churches have become places where believers who are sons are taken to task by other sons and as a result the church fractures and relationships fracture.
I am angered by the fact that I have friends who live in a number of states and cannot connect with local churches because of the Amalekite spirit of predation that enables other believers to cannibalize my friends.
Our responsibility as Prophets and Exhorters is to make sure that our churches are safe communities where no self-respecting Amalekite spirit of Predation would feel safe infiltrating.
EXHORTATIONS TO PROPHETS
Prophets, it is the express responsiblity of you in partnership with Teachers to see to it that this demonic predatory entity called Amalek does not have a toehold in the dignity of someone whom G-d created.
Prophets, you are responsible for the watchcare and defense and dignity and justice due to the spirits of those who are harassed through assault on the second level of principles. It is a justice issue. Period.
Prophets, with due respect, if the principles are yours to embrace in fullness, get your butts onto the second level of human relationships, put your pointy little noses to the grindstone, and work out on that second level until you have earned authority to deal with this tragedy that plagues the church.  It is partially yours.
Believe me, I know it hurts to trust someone who has slammed you.  It hurts to trust when betrayal has set in. It hurts to not be cynical when everything in you is screaming to break this or that friendship.
This level of brokenness that is caused by the low-level, soulish, carnal Prophet who thinks he or she can get away with fracturing relationships or creating church splits out of offense.
There is a time and a place for Prophets to tell someone to “get over themselves”, and there is a time and a place for Prophets to NOT BREAK THE BRUISED REED AND NOT EXTINGUISH THE SMOLDERING WICK and to bind up the broken hearts. And that counsel came from the Teacher Isaiah.  The Prophet’s job is to have the spirit to discern when to say “get over yourself” versus when to mend and deal pastorally with the wounded.  That spirit of differentiation is critical
The authority to mend broken hearts comes ONLY from those who walk in intimacy with the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
And there is a dynamic of intimacy and flow between the Prophet and the Exhorter in this place.
The healthy Prophet/Exhorter combination brings with it a high authority to mend broken hearts and to handle community dynamics, but the test for both is to be able to lay aside the low-level reactionary issues.  The Prophet with the fracturing of relationships and the Exhorter with the controlling of relationships.
Your job, Prophet, is to nix that bloody bitterness and offense, and to flow in principles that enable good relationships to flow forth.
THE NEXUS OF THE PROPHET/EXHORTER PAIRING
When the Prophet and Exhorter work well together, and are healthy to a degree, there are two results
1) The deft and smooth expression of new paradigms of the spirit in language of the soul.  These paradigms are critical in the new season in which we find ourselves.
2) The handling of that second level of principles with such a grace and humility that relationships and community flow.
That requires a death of the Prophet’s penchant to break relationships at the first sign of trouble, and also a death of the Exhorter to the temptation of controlling relationships with a silver tongue.  It also requires a death of the Prophet’s desire to stab you with a frontal assault, and the Exhorter’s desire to stab you in the back with slander to other people.
It is possible, but it takes a lot of work in the area of working the principles that govern human relationships.
Prophet + Exhorter + healthy relationships= mending of bodies + koinonia
MY GIFT SET
If I am a Prophet, I am a very relational Prophet.
If I am an Exhorter, I am a very Principle-driven Exhorter.
But all told, at the end of the day, I think I am a Prophet.
But time will tell, eh?

There were some pretty radical changes that took place in my adult life, in which I recognize a distinct movement from Non-Jewish Forms to some fashion of Jewish forms of worship, not necessarily to be confused with being part of the Hebrew Roots movement.
There are three distinct seasons in my conversion from celebrating Advent and Christmas to Sukkot and Chanukah.
In the first season, which lasted from the age of 4 until about 24, Christmas celebrations were marked by the strong presence of my mother and maternal grandparents. The celebrations in those years were life-giving because they revolved around family, and were accompanied by choir events. The expectation that surrounded these moments was excellent, and I deeply appreciated that.
Then came the second season of its remembrance from 2005 until about 2011, which became excessively negative. I married the mother of my sons, and these celebrations were radically marked by her imposing will. Her love of Christmas was so dominant in her life that her attitude and that of her mother colored everything each December, so that, even when I attempted to reel in some of those celebrations of the vaunted materialism, she retaliated that I was being a Scrooge (yes, if you want to silence someone without understanding their protests of Xmas, then cuss them with “Scrooge” into silence) and the momentum carried me away as her agenda was one of outright control, a mentality that colored our entire marriage.
That dynamic disgusted me, and, unfortunately, my sons were born during that era of confusion and defilement.
As a result, I was left with an emptiness as a result of the superficial celebration of that day.
Then came the third season, the one after my divorce, when G-d orchestrated events in such a way that the first night of Chanukah in 2012 coincided with the return of my joy, after I thought my life was over and I was going to rot in hell for filing for divorce when I swore I never would (adultery makes the scorned party consider all sorts of options, some stupid, and some that are engaged just to stop the bleed-out).
Then came the night after I filed, and after months of not having any emotion because , and a conversation with a Jewish Exhorter, my laughter returned.
And with it, I emerged from a depression over the destruction of my marriage that I. thought. would. never. end.
And in that season when I was forced to file for divorce, it was as my friend David observed, the way divorce should be.
Divorce from anyone, and especially an adulterous spouse, is something to be celebrated in the same way the death of a hated enemy or heathen should be, which is NEVER.
G-d takes no pleasure in the death of the wicked.
Much less in the destruction of a family.
Divorce is designed to be a tourniquet that is applied when the limb of your mate is severed irreparably.
So, treat it with the sobriety of the death in a family, because in Moses’ time, death was what happened in response to adultery.
When adultery happens, it is a full-on fatal bleed-out. And, biblically, two broad categories of options are left to the believer.
Divorce or reconciliation.
When I had first heard my ex-wife had been unfaithful, my response was to give her 90 days to repent.
And then I was forced to admit the brokenness of the marriage because she claimed to love two men.
The day I filed was December 7, 2012: Pearl Harbor Day.
The following night was one of the nights of, if not the first night of, Chanukah.
I was on the phone to a friend from Missouri, processing this.
I had not been able to laugh have strong emotion, or engage socially with anyone outside my close friend, Jeff Sickler. This season was my “dark night of the soul”.
Placid as a still lake on a winter night.
And then, it came.
Laughter.
I don’t believe it was laughter at the stupidity of the situation. It was the laughter of joy. I was able to proceed with my life, and I felt the return of life.
And I was able to connect with people at church and start interacting with those people.
And my zeal for the Scripture returned.
And that unwrapped for me that year during Chanukah, so heavily that that week had marked the calendar.
And at that point, I knew I was to return to that point of memory every year and remember the deliverance that had happened, and the recovery of my light and my joy.
So, Sukkot was a different matter altogether for a different post.
But I leave you with this bit from Saul of Taursus.
“Let every man be fully convinced in his own mind.”

WARNING LABEL: This post contains some radical ideas that many on both sides of the table are not going to like. The sum total of what is offered here is boiled down to two things.
1) What are you going to trust? The gift, as many do, or the giver, as few do?
2) Are your strength, your hardwiring, and your gift on the altar of Romans 12:1-2 and Revelation 12:11?
Is it possible for this combination to work together?
I think it is.
Let me explain.
I have several friends who are Exhorters, and several friends who are Prophets.
The Prophet and the Exhorter don’t always get along.
Usually this is due to the Exhorter and the Prophet having different goals, and radically different foci (plural of focus) from one another, in addition to having radically different personalities.
However, let me explain a situation where a Prophet and an Exhorter get along radically well.
The Prophet is left-brained and analytical and very principle-oriented. He enjoys looking at complex situations, unraveling dozens of situations, and looking for a set of options as solutions to the problems at hand. He walks in a heavy authority to push things and break things down in the area of deliverance, warfare, and inner healing. He also enjoys creating new things that work and working with those people that are abjectly broken and do not have a sense of dignity at all.
The Exhorter, on the other hand, was raised to be relational. Except this Exhorter very early on, learned the value of relying not on his gift, but on his Giver. He learned, intuitively that, while he could use his influence with others to control and manipulate them to get his way, it was not satisfying, and thus made a decision to not to ever lift the sword or the knife to stab others in the back. For years, he watched as other Exhorters did this to him, his friends, and his family. He learned quickly how to be kind and gentle with others, even though he was hardwired with a great deal of intensity, and was capable of being very strong in will.
When they came together as friends, they became a powerful force, because both of their gifts were submitted to the L-rd, and both gifts were made secondary in dependence to both friend’s commitment to the L-rd.
Earlier yesterday, I posted a portion of a conversation that I had had with a very close friend. He told me a couple of things with respect to spiritual gifts in general and Redemptive gifts in particular. He said that what gets the Exhorter into trouble (and this applies to all of the other Redemptive gifts) is the reliance on their gift as their strength to do a great deal of good, because…
IF they fall into the trap of relying on their gift, rather than the Giver…
THEN the same gift, hardwiring, and bent that leads them to work great good, also will eventually lead them to garner favor in such a way that they end up engaging in abusive behavior, exploitation of others, etc.
I then replied that we needed to rely on the Scriptures, instead of our natural gifts.
He corrected me, and I saw then immediately where the conversation was going. He said, “no you can’t, because Prophets do that. They take the principles and rely on those, and at some point they hurt others because they rely on the Principles to accomplish their tasks of solving problems, and then break relationships as a result of doing so”.
“No, instead we really need to remember that we need to learn how to lay down our gifts and surrender them completely to the service of the L-rd, and we need to learn how to not trust in our gift, whether it our capacity to leverage relationships, as the Exhorter does, or our capacity to leverage Scripture, as the Prophet does, and instead place our trust in and reliance on the L-rd himself.
It is rare for a someone with any gift to take that gift and submit the operation of that gift to the desire and decisions of the L-rd.
What he said next, blew me away. “Most Exhorters, for whatever reason, don’t submit their gift back to the L-rd. They rely on their influence with others to get their agendas done…”
I then finished the thought, “When they need to submit the operation of their gifts to the L-rd and work to get His job done.”
He replied, “bingo.”
He then said, “you on the other hand, did I ever tell you what the L-rd told me early on in our relationship?”
I replied, “no, you did not.”
He said, “the L-rd told me specifically, ‘you can trust him. He will never stab you in the back’.”
You see, early on, I had made an internal commitment that I was going to lean hard on the L-rd, no matter what, and that my interest was never in what I was gifted to do, but rather in what He wanted.
And as a result, whenever an opportunity came up where I could use my gift, it was always a question or a sense of, “is this use of my gift honoring or dishonoring of G-d? Is this how he would want me to flow or not?” That set of questioning and thinking saved me from a lot of heartache.
And in this maze of detecting what my Redemptive Gift was, I learned very early on how to set myself to do the right thing. And I front-loaded my life with that sort of thinking. It is just natural for me to think in this given way.
I was so confused for so many years about my gift, because I was very relational and very integrated.
NOTE: The correct adjectival form of the noun “integrity” is not “integrous”, but rather “integrated”. It carries the idea of “singleness of purpose and drive”.
I was a Prophet, and a Teacher, and a Mercy. And now I know who I am.
Early on in my life, I embraced a preference for the hard truth, come hell or high water; a desire for bald-faced honesty; radical devotion for the plans of G-d; and no matter the cost, an outright refusal to stab anyone in the back, ever, for any reason.
When Exhorters observe those behaviors of backstabbing, dis-integration, slandering, and accusation ruining relationships, church fabric, and relational dynamics, and they instead are given to bringing relationships to a high place of integrity, then they make a commitment to embrace the hard work of walking uprightly as best they can and relying on the L-rd to show them how to interact with others.
As I grew later in life and flowered socially, I learned the heavy influence I had on others in terms of relationships, and the power I had to control and leverage those relationships.
In the town where I grew up, I saw this unhealthy dynamic of control used to affect everything from the red lights to the power structure in the local churches and every thing in between.
So, I resisted that dynamic.
And now I recognize the presence in me that drives me to HUNT mercilessly for reality, even when I don’t get the Principle of Sowing and Reaping right.
I did not share that truth until this point in the post for one simple reason: I didn’t want you to read this post through a perceived bias. I did not want you to think, “oh, he is a Prophet. Oh, he is an Exhorter. So now I am going to read this post with these lenses on”, and so miss something you could have gotten by not having those adjudicating lenses on.
I value the three principles that pertain to the Exhorter gift for three reasons:
1) I do not put stock in, and stedfastly refuse to put stock into, my hardwiring until He tells me to put stock into it. That is the first manifestation of the Exhorter’s Principle: Pain and Suffering.
2) I do not leverage unless He tells me to leverage that strength. When He says to sow I sow. That way, the Second manifestation of the Exhorter’s Principle, the Principle of Sowing and Reaping, can take place.
3) I have seen what it looks like when a whole town, that I know is an Exhorter community, refuses to embrace reality and becomes so concerned with its own presentation that it will exploit people, and I refuse to embrace that non-Reality. That is a hardcore embrace of the principle of Reality that enables what is real to flow.
And for the sake of my Husband, who is an Exhorter, I love my people.
And I only recognized all of this, because a high-functioning Prophet, who is not an ass, and who was delivered from petit mal epilepsy, decided he was going to point out to me the places where I have dignity, call them good, celebrate them, and remind me of them.
Most Exhorters have in their lives, Prophets. (I worded this sentence specifically this way on purpose for emphasis)
But most Exhorters do not have in their lives, Prophets who are willing to set the ideological mindset down for a moment in order to speak to them with dignity about their reality and when they do something really good.
By the converse, most Prophets have in their lives, Exhorters.
But most Prophets do not have in their lives, Exhorters who are willing to set aside their capacity to leverage in order pay the price to eradicate the desire to backstab.
And guess what, Exhorters and Prophets?
If you want to see your friendship excel, you have to be willing to on the one side, not trust in your capacity to leverage Scripture in order to protect you and on the other side, not trust in your leveraging of relationships in order to protect you. It will be rough on both sides of the equation.
Prophets cannot trust in their ability to work with ideology. Exhorters cannot trust in their ability to work with relationships.
There is only one place to put your trust in. And that is the place that Scripture calls the Word of G-d in Hebrews 4.
And it is not Scripture, though Scripture is important.
The placed that Scripture calls the Word of G-d in Hebrews 4:12, if you read the context of Hebrews 4:12, is the Word of G-d from John 1.
Jesus is the Word of G-d. He is the Logos of G-d.
Those who refuse to make the L-rd himself their protector and defender are not really willing to make the Prophet-Exhorter relationship work.
I know that sounds hard, but both Prophets and Exhorters have to be willing to embrace pain and discomfort and be willing to not let their legitimacy rest in the fact that they can….
On the Prophet side of the Equation…that they can use the Principles called Scripture to solve problems and fix things…doing those things that create paradigms.
On the Exhorter side of the Equation…that they can use their pull in human relationships to solve problems and fix things….doing those things that give them influence in relationships as an end in itself.
This is not about Prophet’s agenda, or Exhorter’s agenda.
This is about an agenda and a group of men and women that are συνεσταύρωμαι together with Christ. TOGETHER with Christ.
I have a best friend who is a Prophet precisely because this dynamic was the concrete of the foundation between us.
For 14 years, while I was being sexually assaulted by the Jezebel Spirit, when my influence with other human beings was hit-or-miss, I was developing a hidden life with the L-rd. I was learning about how much He loved me.
Prophet, it is not about being able to have influence with principles and ideology through the Bible. It is not about being able to solve problems and fix things. If you make yourself first good at doing that, if you pour yourself into being able to solve problems and fix things, and if you devote your firstfruits to solving problems and fixing things, and the Bible, then you will develop and intimate relationships with “solving problems and fixing things” and the Bible. And “solving problems and fixing things” doesn’t provide a good shoulder to cry on late at night. And having a relationships with the Bible that does not also embrace the Man the Bible speaks out, the Word of G-d HIMSELF, means you have a relationship with a book. Jesus is the Word of G-d: get that (John 1:1-14, Hebrews 4:12, 4:1-11, 4:13-16)! And in that context and only in that context, can you rightly embrace the Bible as the Word of G-d (“every word of G-d proves true”). It is the Man who is the Word speaks His own word that proves true. The Word Spoke the light that flows from Him into existence. The light did not speak the Word into existence.
Exhorter, it is not about being able to influence humans to fix your problems or even to advance your agenda or an agenda that is really good. With whom can you find solace when you feel powerlessness and a victim mindset encroaching on your turf (I could just as easily speak this to the Prophets in my life). If you devote yourself to relationships and intimacy with those horizontal to you, and give your firstfruits to those who are other humans, then you will have intimacy with human beings, and they will be the ones who are forced to comfort you AT ALL TIMES. If you give your firstfruits to “people want and need to be around me” then that is what will be your reaping and resource. And sometimes, humans do not want to comfort other humans. So, to whom can you run when ALL of your human capital, firstfruits, and relationships fall apart?
It’s the Word HIMSELF to whom you can run.
So, sharing some of my personal pain with the Exhorter crowd. When the Exhorter cannot influence others, then the Exhorter has a number of things to which he can run.
But the price of having this relationship is steep, and we are reminded of this daily, and requires a lot of unwavering commitment to keep swords sheathed.
This is why I put such a premium on trusting Prophets, weird it may be for many Prophets and Exhorters to hear, because David, not anyone else, is the benchmark for what a Prophet looks like, just as his wife, Wendy is the benchmark for what a Mercy looks like.
And while he is typical Prophet problem-solver, he is not verbal-expressive, and very left-brained, and before he runs with his gift, he runs after the Giver.
And it is a beautiful thing when that 1st/4th gift interaction begins to work.
But there is a cost and a lot of hard work, and it requires the destruction of cynicism.

It may be just me, but I notice every year, around the last week of December, that people, believers specifically, start posting stuff about how bad the year was and how good the new year is going to be.  It happens annually, and with monotonous regularity.
For whatever reason we are drawn to making declarations about coming year around the last week of the calendar year, and about saying how bad the previous year was.
My thoughts:
This cyclical crazy-making does not make a lot of sense.
Here is why.
I haven’t had a bad year since about 2012 or 2013.  That was the year I filed for divorce.  But filing for divorce did not make the year bad.  Heck, my ex-wife’s adultery which continued to the present, did not make the year bad.  What made the year bad was how her behavior affected my sons. Period.  The ones I am most loyal to that my ex-wife and I share in common, their emotional and spiritual damage, that is what made that year among the worst.
A plethora of celebrities dying does not make a year bad.  A year that caused you to personally struggle a lot and suffer much does not make a year bad.  Personal pain can make a year among the most productive.
The monotony with which you curse the previous year, because you effectively are doing that, does not help your timeline.
The monotony with which you utter the same four to six declarations over the coming year, and then the monotony with which you turn right back around 51 weeks later and declare how that year didn’t bring those things drives some of us crazy.
My solution to this non-reality is not necessarily the most gentle, but it might be realistic.
How about we reach forward, talk to Father, and if a year is going to be marked by suffering and destruction, we hear that from Him and speak concerning that?
If a year is going to be marked by pain, as some years are, as 2012 and 2013 were for me, how about we speak that?
Now, let me expand on that concept from my own life.  Following my biblically-sanctioned divorce, I connected with some other friends who helped me to restore joy in my own life, and I found my voice again.  In the midst of finding that voice, one of those people who helped me negotiate that season with my sons, my Sunday School teacher at the time, who also coached me in forgiveness, also became my wife.
So, 2014 was not a bad year.
Granted, expanding that, 2012 and 2013 were not bad years either.  They were years marked by pain.  But pain does not make something bad.  If you refuse to do anything with the pain, then it becomes unproductive pain, and the year can then be considered unproductive.
But enough of this mentality of “my year was bad, but G-d will make this year better”.
News flash:
Declaring the reality of what the past year was like is not about whether or not your year made you happy or sad, follower of Yeshua.  It is not about whether or not too many Hollywood celebrities died.  It is not about whether or not people made you feel better or worse about yourself.  Instead, it is about whether or not you were and did specifically what Father wanted you to be and do.  And if a lot of pain came in the midst of that, and you grew from that pain, that does not affect the year.  And cursing the year 51 weeks after you uttered all sorts of prophetic nonsense over the year, and doing this each year, does not make you have better years.  Rather, you can be playing right into the enemy’s hands and cursing the cycle of time, which can leave a negative imprint on time.
So, how about instead of “last year sucked, I prophesy this year will be a year of harvest and increase”,  perhaps say, “this year wasn’t what I thought it would be, and there was some pain” and then analyze whether or not you grew in or through the pain?  And then come back and celebrate the times when you saw the hand of Father, Son, or Holy Spirit move, and write an article or Facebook post about that.
For me, this year was strangely turbocharged because of what has blown open with respect to DID, SRA, CRA and blessings I have written for that group.  It also happened to be the year when I reconnected with Exhorters in an unusual way, and was able to work positively with a great many of them.
And now, I must away and fulfill a longstanding need to work my way through Mounce’s Basics of Biblical Greek.
So, friends, let us consider carefully the words we speak in response to the pain we endured, and let us also not throw away the resources that 2017 and its pain were.
Be blessed.

Rick Pino posted a video on Facebook to this effect, calling for Worship Mothers and Worship Fathers who will raise people up into their identity.
He notices a deficit in worship.
Plenty of the usual spiritual fathering motifs abound in this video, such as references to 10,000 teachers but very few fathers, etc.:
https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10155948387013711&id=36976983710


I appreciate that Rick is pointing out a deficit in worship that readily appears to him and probably to others as well: the lack of fathering and mothering in our worship paradigms.
And I will grant there is one of several deficits in worship when it comes to being fathered.
However, with due respect, I have just one serious problem with this cryout that there are no mothers or fathers raising people up into their identity, or that they are needed to break the orphan spirit.
First, you cannot break or expel or cast out the orphan spirit. Also you cannot accomplish what needs to be accomplished against the orphan spirit by human beings pouring in affirmation of another’s identity.
We do not need more human beings acting as fathers and mothers and breaking something that cannot be broken. Further, we don’t need more slaves running around and begging others to father and mother them because they think these are the only available resources. Especially when we add that pernicious doctrine of demons we call “covering” to the mix.
Rather, you DISPLACE the orphan spirit. And only one thing can displace the orphan spirit: the Spirit of Sonship. It comes through a regular vibrant relationship with the members of the Trinity.
Second, a problem isn’t that we need better mothers and fathers. The problem is that we really are often lousy sons because we don’t account for all of the resources available to us, and we reject those resources.
We have an impoverished mindset in the Charismatic/Pentecostal/Fivefold Ministry movement that thinks we need some apostle or father over us as a spiritual parent to raise us into our identity.
And so we run to this or that pastor and beg him to father us, because we believe that the only resource we have is their time and presence.
Also, in the Charismatic movement, we have this pernicious idea that is patently unbiblical called covering that rears its ugly head as a partner to the fivefold ministry. The current model of fivefold fivefold ministry paradigm is broken because it is used as a covering or as a model for church government and oversight, something quite outside the realm of its design.
Covering is code-language for slavery, but that is the topic for another post.
The problem is that we have rejected the best resource for parenting us; We already have a perfect heavenly Father, and in him there is no deficiency, no lack of parenting resources, or integrity, or skill in raising us. Further, it is the blood of his Son that is our covering. We just reject the resources He provides because they comes in forms that we don’t want to receive, for any number of reasons.
We have no need of fathers and mothers to raise us up, especially not those who walk in a spirit of slavery, when we have one Father who is perfect and does not walk in a spirit of slavery. And most of what passes for spiritual fathers and mothers are those with a spirit of slavery.
What we need to learn to do is how to walk in a spirit of sonship to our heavenly Father a d subsequently receive from him in whatever sequence he has for us to receive, and not rush to beg someone who is actually a slave but claims to be a father or mother to fulfill that role.
One aspect of the problem is that we don’t recognize, first, the many resources we already have. Taking Stock of Available Resources is one of the markers of someone with a spirit of sonship.
Slaves or orphans are those who don’t recognize all they have, and subsequently, they think the only resource that will do is another human being’s time and presence.
If I have to beg you to father or mentor me, I am doing it wrong.
The way it works, if you really want to father, is you have to be willing to first ask the L-rd to father you, and second ask him who he has given to you in order to father.
Begging someone for the crumbs of their time is not my problem.
I have been fathered for the last 34 years by the Son of G-d, and he has not failed.to adequately raise me.
And I see the resources around me.
Further, there are people he has given me in order to help father them along to the next stage of their growth.
“No fathers or mothers raising people up into their identity”?
Hello? We already have a perfect Father. We just don’t want to receive that way, because we have been duped into thinking we don’t have enough fathers.
Is Jesus not father enough?
Speaking of resources, allow me to point you in the direction of some helpful resources for helping you progress in this journey.
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLC3C9326F3904B74E

There is a dynamic about me that I discovered sometime ago. I was working in the life of a married couple that needed some input as to dealing with a situation that was abusive to them both.
A number of years back, this couple introduced me to their church leadership, and I immediately knew these people were spiritually abusive.
And following that meeting, I told this couple that they needed to get rid of and leave this abusive place.
I knew where it was going. They may have heard what I said, but they were not comfortable leaving. So, I decided to let the sleeping dog lie, but every time something came up involving these people, I would voice a reminder that they were off.
A couple of years after this happened, the husband heard that they needed to leave. And some dynamic of the marriage was strengthened.
And in that moment, when I had gladly heard that my concerns were valid, I knew something about myself.
When I function as a counselor in any sort of capacity especially when it comes to married couples, I have a capacity to disconnect my feelings about the friendship from the priority of preserving those marriages. If I am faced with the option of seeing a healthy marriage remain intact, even if it means giving the couple some hard counsel, and that counsel will come at the expense of my friendship with the couple, then that is a cost I am willing to pay every single time.
My interest in marriages is, when possible, to see those marriages remain intact. Whatever currency I have in friendships with members of those marriages is something I will not think twice about spending to that end.

Loren Sandford, who pastors New Song Church in Colorado Springs, made an observation some months back about eclipses and blood moons and other phenomena with which I heartily agree.  Further, his thoughts pair well as a contrast to the subject of this post: Predictability versus unpredictability.
Paraphrasing the number of posts Loren had up on the subject, when Acts 2 describes for us suns being darkened and moons being turned to blood, and when the sun was darkened during Passover when Jesus was on the cross, those events did not describe regular, cyclical, and predictable events.  Translation: when Jesus died, the sun was not eclipsed. It was darkened. For hours at a time. For us to take cyclical and predictable celestial objects and use them as markers to interpret eschatological and apoctalyptic portents and prophecies has never worked.
Granted, Genesis 1 refers to these things as signs, but they are regular, predictable, and cyclical signs, much in the same way that a clock points to hours and minutes as signs that the season, hour, or minute is changing.
When the prophecies of Joel 2 and Revelation are fulfilled, we will not wonder if this or that predictable event will be the long-awaited sign.  Those scriptures point to things that no man has ever experienced, and which no one will ever experience again once they happen. Those signs will be very unpredictable.
This leads me to the next thing I wish to say: a brief thought that is overlooked.  The sun, moon, and stars are predictable, and follow regular cyclical patterns.  The fourth day, being linked to the rest of the lists of sevens in Scripture, follows a predictable pattern, a cyclical pattern, just like the menorah in the tabernacle must follow a set pattern of predictable refilling, and just like the shield of faith must follow a set pattern of predictable use in order to be effective at quenching the regular darts of the evil one.
Predictability is inbred into the fourth of the cycle.
When the L-rd returns, one of the signs of his return is that the predictability of the celestial bodies will come loose in a show of unpredictability.
He who has ears to hear, let him hear.

Carl Killingsworth is someone I deeply respect as a friend and as an occasional mentor. He has walked places that I have walked before I wakes there. We have some common friends in Missouri, and some precious memories.
I served with him on altar teams at a previous church, and, other than my wife, his example colors just about every decision I make at the altar or when working with people who are in need of healing or deliverance:
His conversations with me on the late Kenneth Hagin shaped my views on Hagin deeply. Hagin, like him or not, was very influential on those of us who stand in the Charismatic and Pentecostal Tradition.
Carl made a comment on cusswords and disparaging speech that is worth sharing, so I present it for your consideration below.

I suspect God is a lot less bothered by a cussword every now and then than He is by the parent berating a child, or a spouse berating or criticizing their partner. There is so much of that in our world, Bosses thinking that criticizing is the same as correction, Parents labeling their children as stupid, worthless, etc, or the verbal abuse that occurs in relationships. The power of words is immense, and if I bellieve the condemning critical things spoken over me and begin to affirm them with my own mouth, a spiritual stronghold is built that may never be broken. And that can be accomplished by never uttering anything near what we consider a “cuss word”
My parents did something with me, and I did so with my children, When they needed correction, Mom would say, good boys don’t to that, you are a good boy so STOP IT, and if I didn’t she would spank my butt.

All I can say is wow.