Social Intonation: A Dynamic of Community, and a Major Need of the Exhorter

G-d the Father is the G-d of Community.  He it is that is the Member of the Trinity that is devoted to life and our sense of Belongingness.
It is through Him that we understand we belong.
And it is He who sets us where He wants.
 
The communities that we form on the third level of holiness are critical to the networking of whatever plan the L-rd has for us.
And we are supposed to not only be thrown willy-nilly into whatever communities at hand, but more specifically, we need to be placed by our Father (1 Corinthains 12:18) were we were designed to fit.
Amanda Damon, a friend of our family’s, made an observation, concerning Exhorters, because with Exhorters, it is painful to deprive them of social networks and groups of friends, without which they suffer deeply, as did one of my close friends:

An Exhorter homeschooler needs people.  It just means the parents get to choose what people.  Tons and tons of homeschool community these days.  Field trips every week, co-ops if you want, group electives, Konos, the possibilities are endless.  I think it more depends on the parents and how in tune to their kids they are. Homeschooling can be a place to thrive!

First, let me say this much.
With respect to Exhorters, if you are going to homeschool an Exhorter, it is true that you will get to pick what people with whom the socialize.  However, it also means that you need to ACTUALLY EXECUTE THE RESPONSIBILITY TO PROACTIVELY pick some peeps to connect with your Exhorter.  Don’t just assume that because you homeschool your kids, and you have the freedom to pick the kids they hang with, that they are going to end up with the right crowd.
The freedom to pick playmates for your bubbly Exhorter is also the responsibility to expose them to people, so that together you can pick out the right people for them.
Otherwise, they will pick anybody and everybody.
Second, more generally, note that phrase “in tune”.  It reminds me of Mr. Hardy, my high school Chorus teacher. He placed a premium on this concept in music that we call intonation.  It applies to music.
But Amanda’s comment, in response to a hard conversation on homeschooling, caused me to hear an idea for the first time.
Social intonation.
We need “social intonation”. We need to be placed in a community that not only looks right, feels right, seems right, and enhances our image, but also one that sounds right, AND one with which we can tune and among which we can blend well.
And we need the right kind of community even if it conflicts with deeply-held convictions and biases.
Some Exhorters need homeschooling.  And as a result, their parents are thus required to select friends for them, because those Exhorters by and large REQUIRE socialization of some sort.
When we develop unqualified biases for or against a certain type of community in all of its manifestations, whether the institution is homeschooling or church or any ither type of school or business or people of differing faith views and we say, “All [pick your institution]s are [bad/good/terrible]”, then that keeps us from seeing the possible good in a situation.
When I say all homeschooling is bad for Exhorters because they don’t get to socialize, then it keeps me from seeing the possibilities for socialization that are available with at least a modicum of effort.
Now, let’s pull back and distill a more general principle.
Those biases that keep us from seeing comprehensively and clearly are then harnessed by the Mesmerizing Spirit and we thus cease seeing clearly.  We then stop seeing situations, circumstances, places, and people accurately and with precision (the way the L-rd sees them).
As a result, we become candidates for the Spirit of Deception.  And the moment we are willing to believe the lies of the Spirit of Deception, then sooner or later the lie involves some sort of pit of despair, a trap which this spirit lays.  And if we follow that path of deception into the pit of despair, the subsequent downward spiral can lead to death and suicide.
We deeply need to be part, not just of any community, but the community that Father picks out for us, whatever community that looks like.
For, we can possess our birthright as individuals, but we will not become people of destiny outside of community.
Thus, when you are looking for a community, ask yourself, “is this a community with which I can blend to make that right sound?”.
Find the right sound for your hardwiring.  Find the right gathering that meshes with your hardwiring.
And be blessed, gang.  This is a new concept, but it is one that I am hashing out repeatedly.