The Process…..And How G-d Wounds and Heals a Marriage

Whelp, the Teacher post is again delayed….But that is okay for the moment.

If you are coming from the previous post in this chain, you will know I just dealt with the Mercy, Spider Man from the Marvel Cinematic Universe, because I love dealing with and analyzing the culture for patterns of the Redemptive Gifts.

Two cuss words ahead….

Reality…..

It’s a difficult thing to grasp….

In fullness…

Frequently, it doesn’t end the way we want it to end.

But, all our curses, and all our pain, and all our offenses, will not change a thing. Our Only one thing present can redeem us, our pain, our offenses, our curses, our janked-up lives.

The Root of Reality….

He sets the lonely in families, but he first does this by giving us battle buddies, partners, lovers, wives, husbands, brothers. Pairs. It takes a couple to make a family. And that couple started, if redemptive, by Father’s initiation, at the Bridegroom’s response, by wooing us to Himself first. And then by enabling us to see reality if we will embrace it. And that may take us embracing a great deal of pain in order to get to reality in fullness.

Families come because Father places us in proximity, and enables us to fight for one another.

And this unity starts and leads to endurance in fullness because husband and wife will fight for one another according to truth and principles. Unity can only come between husband in wife when they will fight for one another first, and then in the context of that, to fight for those given to them. If we stop being foxhole buddies reloading against the real enemy together, then we are fighting with half our fucking resources.

And I am done watching people fight with half their hands tied behind their backs.

I am done watching people insisting on a fighting with a handicap, and resisting the whole of what Father has given us.

You must fight alongside, pointing your weapons at the true enemy.

That’s reality.

Christ does not fight without his bride.

Why would we expect to be able to fight the enemy of our souls without the keeper of our hearts and lovers of our spirits?

In both of my marriages, my wives and I fought on our own.

I have spent 38 years watching couples fight one another with their earned authority or neglecting their earned authority, focusing on one another with their weapons, rather than partnering against the true enemy.

And I am done with this broken-ass paradigm.

If a marriage is to succeed fully, husband and wife must be joined as partners in the fight. Completely.

If there is a division, then that marriage will be hamstrung. Which means G-d must get us to the place of radical interdependency on one another, partnered with the Executing Spirit (whereas Defilement means “to break apart and violate principles”, Holy and Holiness means “to weave together principles to produce change”, and thus, “to execute”; G-d doesn’t just set us apart to leave us in a place, but rather sets us apart TO DO SOMETHING: it’s a number-line and a vector (direction plus motion) not a boundary line like a fence), then the threefold cord can proceed to the set of works for which we were designed.

Gang, you don’t do this without your partner. Which means G-d has to enable partnership.

Russian Epic of Cinderella……

If shoe fits, wear it….

And in this case, the shoes are the shoes from the Armor of G-d, and no they are not called the Shoes of Peace. The Shoes, which parallel the Redemptive Gift of Teacher, are called the Shoes of Readiness.

καὶ ὑποδησάμενοι τοὺς πόδας ἐν ἑτοιμασίᾳ 

And having bound on the shoes of/in readiness/equipment/preparation

Aaaaaannnnddd cue Teacher rant, because I know that gift…..

DISCLAIMER: If you think this is only directed at the Teachers, you are sorely mistaken. I only talk about the Teacher because it is the gift I love and know the best.

The Principle of Responsibility is tied to being ready and equipped and capable of handling the situations in perfection and excellence with a well-thought-out-and-well-revealed strategy from heaven that is multipronged and give consideration to a breadth of factors.

Boy Scout Motto….Be Prepared….

Deliberate, intense, thoughtful, thorough, perfect….

Take the text the knowledge and do what Del Tarr said and allow the Trinity to turn that knowledge into “KNOWLEDGE ON FIRE”.

Teachers, your job is to lead the charge on this, as did the sons of Levi did at the foot of Horeb, and put your sword to your belt and handle business. Reading the law and hoping it will deliver on the thing on which you should be acting with skill and zeal is not sufficient.

You must do that thing yourself.

And those shoes, which are part of the equipment of every believer and follower of Messiah means that each believer must also get ready and be ready.

That flows from a Gospel of Wholeness/Shalom, but the outward quality that shows itself in the EXECUTION is readiness…..and that skill must predominate between couples that are the root of a family.

And readiness is how you establish a kingdom. Are you ready to run and fight and build and move and work with what you have been given.

That is the work of sons.

And just as men can be the Bride of Messiah, women too can be sons. Congratulations, life is uncomfortable for everyone.

Matthew 24:44…

Get ready……

And now, maybe I can get to the Teacher in due course.

BETTER LATE THAN NEVER: WINDOW OF RECONCILIATION

Gang, I did promise to present on this during March, but the unusual set of events that transpired, with reconciliations to multiple friendships, followed by losses of some significant friendships really was not something I was expecting….I received an unusual grace personally and intend to see advancement happen on every level for myself personally and for this group which is something I am stewarding for the King. His agenda….His resources…

Arthur has covered the idea of Window of Reconciliation, but I wanted to cover it in my own language…

So, that said….

1) what is a window of reconciliation generally?,

2) what are they for our purposes, specifically?, and

3) when and how do we access them?

For the purposes of our discussion, I intend to be an extremely practical. I want you to understand so that you can apply this the next time they come around.

Generally speaking, 1) A window of reconciliation is any period of time during which there is an opportunity combined with a Grace for bringing certain elements more cohesively together.

Now, I would not be surprised if they were other windows, that we have not discovered as a tribe.

After all, this is not the Arthur Burk show. We don’t merely sit around and wait like a bunch of consumers for him to tell us what we need to do.

He is very important to our constellation, because he does have a really good grip on the principles, and he does a whole lot of bleeding-edge research.

But I don’t think he wants those of us that affiliate with him to just sit around, waiting for him to come up with things in order to act.

I think he wants us each to walk in the principles, act according to our design, and propagate our own material in collaboration with the King.

Let me build an answer to Point 2, and then I will come back to other windows, possibly existing.

2) As some of you may already know, there are at least four windows that have been discovered.

And they run pretty regularly in accordance with the two equinoxes, and the two solstices throughout the year.

In order, starting with March, they are:

A) Window of Reconciliation With Community (March 10-31)
B) Window of Reconciliation With Land (June 10-30)
C) Window of Reconciliation With G-d (September 10-30)
D) Window of Reconciliation With Destiny (December 10-31)

And with respect to each of those for dynamics, there appears to be a grace to engage with those particular dynamics during those particular times of the year.

3) We answered the when of this question (during the dates in question). How we access them is by intentionally engaging with the principles necessary to build each of those dynamics.

For example, for healthy community, there is a book by Cloud and Townsend called Boundaries. I can recommend other books easily, but for my particular purposes, and my own particular situation, that book has been critical to the building of healthy community and relationships. And with the number of relationships that reactivated this past March, and that I was given access to, paired with the relationship I lost, because boundaries became a major sticking point for whether or not those relationships strengthened or weakened, that book has been central in this season of growth. The book I would recommend also would depend on the nature of the community with which one is dealing. There are books on marriage and family, dating, parenting, you name it.

For reconciling land, there are resources from Arthur if you want to go that route, and also John Loren Sandford. I also recommend taking to someone who is good with discerning land dynamics and structures. Given I do this fairly extensively, and I enjoy working with land, I am able to help in this arena.

But reconciling to land is one of those things we don’t often think of, especially because of the stigma associated with New Age tied to land.

The real problem with people who would assign the label New Age to given practice, is that New Age really boils down to one thing: period. Object of worship. In my particular case, I actually talk to land and plants and structures on land on a fairly consistent basis. And I know with those plants and structures in the land are often feeling at times. If you were to hand me a map of a piece of land, I’m fairly adapter, telling you what sort of structures are on it. And I’ve also worked with portals pretty extensively.

Some others have earned authority in the area of human relationships. And I would also recommend conversations with those sorts of people.

Anyway, these segments of time card windows of reconciliation were made, so that we could interact with those four dynamics, and make some tremendous mileage counts in the arena of growth. Because Father doesn’t just want us to heal and deliver; He also wants to see us grow.

Anyway, those are some initial thoughts. I look forward to your questions, comments or other thoughts.

Also, as to the dynamic as to whether or not, there are other windows…. I have begun experimenting with the window of reconciliation of 10 days on either side of Halloween to see if there is any thing that takes. I could be imagining things, or there could actually be something there.

Be blessed.

Happy Anniversary, Destined Ones; 2022 WOR Blessing #1, Blessing Your Comings and Goings

Copyright © 2015 by David McCullough

You knew I would not miss this one for the world.

December 17 is here.

Wilbur (Prophet) and Orville (Teacher). The Wrights, from Dayton, Ohio. Not thinking about many things besides their obsession with this contraption and how to keep it in the air, financially and literally. Ponderous studies of birdflight, gliding, weather patterns, and harnessing the wind. Contemporaries that didn’t consider a fraction of the factors they did.

You can have a vision and grandiose plans, but you also need the anchored minds on the ground considering all the variables and how to weave them together into a package that works. When the visionary get hammered, he or she needs a home and a refuge of safety to come home to. A stedfast and burnished rock, a galvanized screw able to turn and stay in place. A warm cup of coffee or tea for the cold and hard climate, a gentle and listening ear to handle the venting, a game to distract the mind from the problems out there, and a heart full of love, trust, and belief within to combat the shit lies of the naysayers and clowns without.

A cool saucer for the hot cup.

A Senate for the House.

A gold for the blue and the red.

A “Peace! Be Still!” for the chaos at sea.

A mindset of rest for the maelstrom at work.

A community of love as protection from the hostility of the adversaries.

And snappy socks and a warm mustachioed face for the dour, meticulously-clean-shaven expression and plain dress of a man obsessed.

A Teacher for the Prophet.

A tinkerer who has considered every angle to keep his tunnel-visioned partner safe.

A man in the plane protecting his brother on the ground.

Chocolate for the raspberries (you know who you are).

And a Tuxedo or a Maine Coon for the doge in your life.

In short, the likeliest of unlikely companions that, when put together, create the life-giving synergy.

Never settle, but be able to enter into the rest that is Him, even while you work…for He Himself is your fullest Shabbat

Beloved, I invite your spirit to be present as I speak to you for this season.

Spirit, listen to the word of G-d for you for today.

You shall…talk of them…when you walk by the way,

From Deuteronomy 6:7 ESV

Beautiful and affectionate spirit, you have received many things from the King in many seasons of your life, and you have also endured much from season to season. Much that is tough, and much that has been hard, no fun, and painful as Ben Hinnom.

I know that, because of the pain you have endured, you might not trust the King or Abba in heart, but you might have a capacity logically in mind to so do. And that is okay. The King will be patient and tender with you.

I know you might also be hung up on, “what the heck is my destiny?”, and “what is my purpose?”

But I know, as a recipient of the deep love of G-d, I want to bless you with the capacity to access a deep revelation of the Father’s heart when you are ready for it.

I bless you with ease of access.

I bless you with a solid place of hope.

I bless you with the faith that Messiah has in you. You probably have never looked at it that way. Usually we think of how we are repeatedly commanded to believe and have faith, but we too often miss the fact that G-d has faith in us and believes in us. That is why He adopted us. And you, beautiful spirit, were part of that adoption and love.

I bless you with every good and perfect gift that is from above and is specifically earmarked for you.

I bless you when you come in, and I bless you when you go out.

I bless you to be the giver of that love to many, and the recipient of that love from many who are trustworthy.

I bless you with the three square feet of completely-Father-protected space so you can come and go, that your comings and goings may be full of His blessing and favor.

I stubbornly resist and reject and repudiate the clowns and thieves, the faithless and accursed that would seek robbery of you on the highways and the country roads and in the woods.

I bless you with the melekim that minister life and protection while you travel from place to place.

And I call for the Father of Lights, the Ancient of Days to shine His light of every trap and wile of the enemy so that your paths may be made safe, and straight, and cleared.

Spirit, I bless you with love and tenderness and acceptance, and clear skies for your flights and your experiments and your tinkering.

Be filled with His affectionate grace, spirit.

In the name of Yeshua.

Amein…

No Room in the Christmas Inn for Jesus: By Dorothy Mitchell

[We depart from our usual inner healing thoughts to offer a Christmas rant. Or maybe we are giving in to the ornery feels we sometimes get at this time of year. In any case, feel free to skip past the rant to the positive suggestions at the end.]

What comes to mind when you think of Christmas? Is it the colors red, green, and white? A bearded man with a big belt-buckle and a dozen reindeer? Pretty lights, candles, bells, and baubles? Evergreen tree, holly, and mistletoe? Edible candies, cookies, and figgy pudding, with drinkable eggnog or mulled wine? Maybe brightly colored presents near a crackling fire on a snowy winter evening? Or vacation with family in plaid pajamas watching movies and playing the Grinch game?

Where’s Christ in the Christmas traditions, and can secular foreigners tell the difference? We know Santa’s apparel is merely an outdated and conveniently sensational aesthetic, but I once had a Japanese Buddhist tell me quite seriously that he thought the Santa hat was religious! That the Santa figure has inspirational roots in the saint Nicholas of Myra the secret gift-giver is indisputable, but the myth draws on the tiniest sliver of the textured life of the historical man in a craven world. Saving young women from prostitution through the provision of dowry is not exactly a digestible concept for young children—but it is far less sentimental and far more vital, giving insight into the early church pouring into the broken society surrounding it, a picture that still has modern counterparts all over the world. Instead, the image of the saint has been twisted into a carrot-and-stick dynamic that spontaneously reinvents new evil counterparts for Santa— Krampus devil, Black Pete, Elf on the Shelf—when Santa’s naughty list and lump of coal doesn’t seem extreme enough for scaring children into good behavior and inculcating in them a punitive and rule-bound world-view that is ripe for conforming to abuse.

I think it’s time to face the fact that the concept of Christmas has been divorced from the idea of the birth of Jesus for many years now—in the public mind at least, if not in yours. Despite the ‘Christ’ hidden at the center of the word “Christmas,” that is, “Christ-mass,” he’s not overtly included in most media definitions of the holiday or its celebrations and its value to English-speaking culture. He’s clearly in the bottom ten percent of December ads, parties, traditions, and contemporary songs. New wintry pop songs are written every year, but few Christian carols with staying power (not remixes!).

As for “recent” media and literature, with the warm and genuine exceptions of angelic appearance and testimony to George Bailey’s worth in It’s A Wonderful Life (1946), the Narnian Father Christmas of The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe (1950) whose ability to meet the Pevensie children at their level of joy and understanding and equip them with tools for battle and adulthood reflects a fragment of the nature of God that subverts certain tropes about Santa Claus, and Linus’ long scripture-quoting speech in Charlie Brown Christmas (1965), there has been precious little new popular media that attempts to grapple with these subjects in any sincerely Christian way that isn’t a pageantry retelling of the Biblical Christmas Story itself. Hmm. Scratch Charlie Brown Christmas off the list there. Of course, Nativity scenes do cameo in film occasionally, most memorably in Home Alone (1990)—but again, this happens far less frequently than the inclusion of secular displays, and only when it is narratively thematic or funny. That’s because the Christ story is not and never was culturally neutral. It comes fully loaded with quiet rebuke, and the world knows that. It’s also very difficult to pull off without preaching.

Sorry, Linus; I give you a pass because we know it’s in your character.

The way stories and movies portray the “spirit of Christmas” and the “joy of Christmas” has never landed very well. I always listen carefully to the definitions given by popular films and I am invariably perplexed. There is an obsession with converting cynics to cheerleaders. What they seem to portray as the desired outcome of December 25th in particular is just downright strange: more specific, selfish, and illusory than the common fruit of the spirit of joy and the good news of salvation or the spirit of sacrificial generosity, and fathering. “Belief in Christmas” (not Christ) is something so fragile that lies are required to protect it from being lost and saved. Whatever counterfeit this Christmas offers—false cheer, false charity, false joy, false hope, false humility, false kindness, good behavior, whimsy, pressure, mania, desperation, sales, perfection, greed, you name it—from the first to the last, I don’t want it. It’s creepy and paltry. But I can’t help but be fascinated with horror because people seem so enthralled by this unachievable yet tawdry thing, magic.

MAGIC. FANTASY.

Do you not know who you are, child of God? Is our God not greater than magic? Does he not satisfy the longings of our hearts, and not merely the appearance of perfection of the flesh? Does he not supply realer than real substance, not fool’s gold and faery cake that melts in the sunlight? Which thing do we really want to receive?

And what do we want to do during this season? Do we want to perform, or do we want to serve? What Martha did to prepare for Jesus as her guest was necessary, but Mary chose the greater thing, and Jesus never told Martha to be the perfect housewife. As host, she too had an opportunity to dance from service through hospitality to intimacy—or to guilt, blame, and jealousy. Her sacrifice enabled her sister to invest in her relationship with Jesus for a few more precious minutes. I wonder if she looked back on that moment later in her life and went, wow. God really made the most of that time, and I had no idea what I did for her. Jesus made it clear that relationship was for Martha, too, when she was ready to take off her hostess hat.

The war for our attention has already been won, and it wasn’t the “culture war” that put Jesus in the “irrelevant to Christmas” category. The lack of creativity from Christians, by Christians, to Christians, about Christ and the true nature of the Father has resulted in complete inability to compete with the deluge of new content produced by the other side that doesn’t honor or point back to Christ Jesus of Nazareth in any way, shape, or form. Fancy being crowded out of your own holiday by Santa and the ‘ol razzle-dazzle! I don’t care if his ilk or imagery is Christian or pagan or an unholy mixture of neither and both. It’s a most incredibly effective distraction!

What has been more effective than anything else at stripping Jesus from the holiday is simply the saturation of crass song and imagery and the erosion of quiet time across the entire holiday season. Putting more angry words into the ether doesn’t help. The only thing that will save Christmas from the full and complete perversion of itself is true peace. Instead of adding to the competition, a fight that we lose by participating in it, I suggest we silently find ourselves a new space for contemplation. Call it a strategic retreat.

I am so fricking distracted by human activity and drama around Christmas that even if I try to give Jesus the focus that he deserves, I feel guilty and weird about it. Truth be told, he doesn’t need that kind of torn, stricken worship. The intensity of this time is too much for the quiet I need to give full honor to Jesus with my whole heart; I freely admit that. It’s too much.

Here’s what I am going to do: relax. Stop trying. Do what I do well. Let the day December 25th be as secular as it wants to be. Cut out what is harmful and let the rest go. We don’t actually have a duty to defend this holiday, and we, the remnant, have more important fish to fry. What’s liberating is the truth that Jesus’ birth can be celebrated any time of year, free of extraneous baggage and distracting competing traditions. We don’t actually know the precise day or the hour of Jesus’ birth; we have symbolic gestures and a few theories, some with more evidence than others, but no perfect proof. We can come up with our own reasoning, and make it personal.

For my own family, when we have asked how we can best represent Jesus in this season, he has replied that since the purpose of Christmas these days is to show love to one another, we should decorate to the degree that decorations support that effort—to display just enough to make one another feel warm, welcome, and comfortable, and not to stand out with a lack of decoration.

Now ask the Lord for your own instructions. Or make him a proposal and ask for his approval. Your choice!

We are welcome to celebrate him anytime, whether in June, or September, or May, or October. You may celebrate him on Sukkot (for he tabernacled with us). You may celebrate him on Hannukah (for he is the light of the world). Or do you want to celebrate him 5-6 days before or after Rosh Hashanah, in accordance with the medieval reasoning for the December 25th date? Go for it! You are welcome to celebrate his conception, or his trimesters, or his birth. You are welcome to consider his stays in Bethlehem, Jerusalem, Nazareth, and Egypt on a five- or three-year cycle. (How I long to know what challenging experiences Mary and Joseph went through while on Mission Savior’s Toddlerhood: Escape from Herod – Emergency Staycation in Egypt!) You can speculate when and where the journey of the magi began and ended and celebrate their progress over the course of the year. You may imagine when the angel appeared to Mary. You have the opportunity to consider Jesus’ birth at every census, at every quest for reunion and rediscovering homeland, at every farm, at every hotel and inn, or with every new baby. You may even confront or redeem a relevant holiday of your own problematic pagan heritage. You are free to play it safe and free to take risks.

Do it when you want to. Do it when your heart feels quiet, not stressed. Don’t let any tradition—even or especially church tradition—bully you. When do you feel drawn to contemplate this part of his life on Earth?

Resources

For more on the value of establishing one’s own personal rhythms of worship, see “Tools for Cleansing Time and Land,” Arthur Burk, 2011

The Gospel of Desire: Part 8; Matt. 18:15-20: Desires of the Body To Return to Stasis

Current Location: The Mountains above Telluride, CO

WARNING: For those who read my blog regularly, regardless of whether or not you like my exegesis, this is Top 3 most important posts I will ever write, because the material governs the marriage of truth, relationships, and how the Desire of Reconciliation gets deeply executed. Pass this one onto your friends, gang!

NOTE: When I was going to write this, I got attacked by the enemy with memories of violations of this passage. I realized, I could have written a hot-headed piece here really easily. But that would not have served the purpose when my greater desire is for relationships to be healed more than being right or justified. True to Jack and Trisha Frost’s mantra, “would you rather be right or have relationship?”. In this case, in the case of this text, I’d rather have relationship and things be tender, especially with those with whom I am building the Kingdom. Especially since in this season, tenderness, and affection, mercy, and intimacy are supposed to be the hallmarks of productive Kingdom relationships. With that disclaimer, let’s jump in, gang…

The Reasoning For This Post

You know, there are a few pressing things that I must read and write about, and this is one of those that simply could not wait for the sequence of expository writing to come into fruition, as I am writing sequentially about the Gospel of Matthew as The Gospel of Desire. There are too many real present-day needs that require this exposition now.

Why is that?

Because 1) it feels like too many people do not understand the boldness of Matthew 18:15-20 married to its skillful execution and bathed in tenderest affection for people from whom we are alienated, and 2) because they are not willing to unpack its fullest triple meaning, they might rather either:

  • beat someone to death and give them the left foot of fellowship, or
  • leave a potentially toxic solution to stew, because they are too intimidated to confront a solution, and thus creating no solution and leading to the decay of a G-d ordained thing, or
  • The aggrieved party sends someone else to work their issue out with the party that offended them simply because of intimidation.

And none of these solutions is tenable when we have been given, by a loving Father, every good and perfect gift necessary for both fullest life and holiest godliness. The third option is not really workable precisely because Matthew 18 commands you to go, rather than send someone else to do your work for you.

To wit, when we stand in the place of the person who actually has the issue and instead serve as a middle man, we might unknowingly enable them to more deeply marry a spirit of fear, rather than marry the power, loving affection, and disciplined sound mind that Christ died for each of us to have through the power of Holy Spirit.

So, in light of that, we are going to lay down the biblical text for correction from Matthew’s Gospel, then break it apart into its steps, and finally highlight the mindset necessary to walk in this path well.

Because then end goal is not to be right and correct. The end goal truly is “where do we go from here? is actual reconciliation possible?” For our desire, per the Tenth Commandment, is for our hearts and minds, indeed the whole of our inner world, to fully align with the Messiah we love, serve, and with whom we partner in tender relationship. We want our friends back, not further wedged from us.

Let’s begin.

The Biblical Text

“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”

Matthew 18:15-20, ESV

The System

  1. If your brother sins against you…“: First ask, “has your brother or sister actually sinned against you?” Is there something they have done that is a violation of principle or biblical text? Is there a delusion or non-reality present that is enabling them to have a mindset that could bring further harm to the project, vision, community, or connection that G-d has set in place? Is there a matter of truth that has been violated such that it could create havoc or open a door that G-d did not want open? Are we giving the enemy a foothold by this behavior happening? What are the consequences of the actions in question?
  2. Go…“: You go. Don’t send your pastor, your boss, your HOA president, your apostle, your covering, your momma, your daddy, your brother, your counselor, your Facebook group moderator, your whatever. You go. You. Alone. Intimidated because they have a big personality or there is a greater issue and you do not want your identity revealed? Then you do not have a big enough problem to risk the stronghold of gossip. This is not for someone else to solve and work through. This is not for you to leave to fester and stew. You will need to handle your own business. G-d gives you a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind. You talk. Relaying that “others are intimidated by your behavior” is really classless and refuses to take the text into account.
  3. Tell him or her their fault“: Be clear. Don’t blanket someone with condemnation and attack their identity. Keep the eye and the mouth focused on the problem, the issue, the behavior, not the person. Be specific. These are the issues that are troubling me, and they have the capacity to harm me further, yourself further, others further.
  4. Between you and him alone: You share examples of how the problem has harmed you and your family. At this point do not broaden the issue to say “people have told me this about you and your behavior has harmed them.” No. You spell out issues that YOU have noticed and how they have impacted YOU. If it needs to go beyond that, and you have concrete examples, share those, but at this point. If a number of YOU have the same issue, each should go and say “this has happened between me and you, and we need to deal with it. This is not a time for you to say, me and all these other nameless people have been hurt.
  5. If he has listened, you have gained your brother: The point of this whole exercise is reconciliation, so for G-d’s sakes to be brash or arrogant or prophety. This ain’t the time for your attitude to come across, or your snark, or your smart-assed remarks. This is the time for you to just state the facts, or the observations. Cooler heads here, and tender hearts, must prevail so you can gain back your friend. You want to provide at each point in this juncture, clear guidance on what the way back home looks like. Establish what that should look like in writing. What it looks like for him or her to be jointly fitted together with you and the others in the expression of community that you both value and where they seem to be causing trouble. (Repent, renounce, confess issue, handle the issue, and put the problem to rest, and welcome them back with tears and joy and NOT BITTERNESS OR CALLOUSNESS).
  6. There may be a trust issue along the way that takes time to rebuild, but there should be a timeframe where he or she sees hope for an end to the process and knows they will be restored.
  7. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he resists your approach, given your goal should be reconciliation (and if your goal is not reconciliation, then you need to put your wrath on hold and give yourself a few days or weeks until your head is screwed on rightly and you can be a bit more objective. I know the situation is bleeding from an artery, and sometimes you just want to cut someone off like a cancer, but the King may have something He wants to do.
  8. One other aspect of point 6. You want to establish objectively how you got to this point, “what happened? Did you say these words to these people?” Take the emotion out of it. It’s hard, especially for the Prophet, the Exhorter, and the Mercy (The First, Fourth, and Seventh Redemptive Gifts found in Romans 1:6-8 are frequently given to deep emotion: see here for teaching on that topic) but you must be a lawyer here and be dispassionate and look at facts and evidence.
    “Did those precise words have an impact?”
    “If so, what was the real impact. Cause and effects.”
    “What happened?”
    “What was the fruit of their actions.”
    “I can write someone off in the heat of anger. But is that the right thing for the community right now?”
  9. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church: Take this to the larger body of believers in your community whose authority this person recognizes and is in relationship with. You believers together make up some expression of the body of Messiah. It may not be a formal church, but it may be a group of more than the couple you took with you to begin with. Those who have been affected should all attest to the veracity of the problems presented by this person. And offers of how reconciliation may be done should be spelled out. And in this process, offer reconciliation with affection.
  10. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. : If, at the end of the process, where reconciliation should have been offered every step of the way, and the way back home should have been offered, if he is still resistant, then you part ways and let them know the door will be open, but until they stop their behavior, it cannot be part of your community and they are not welcome. Say good-bye if they refuse to stop their behavior.

The Relevant Epilogue

“Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”

Gang, I am going to say this repeatedly until either the church gets it or I am home with the King. This will not go away, so let me spell it out.

Real simple.

Binding means “to forbid”.

Loosing means “to loose or release”. In other words “to allow”

Gang, read what I say here.

I REFUSE TO USE THE WORDS “BIND” AND “LOOSE” IN PRAYER EVER FOR ANY REASON.

I USE THE WORDS “I PERMIT” OR “I FORBID”.

Period. I forbid these actions. I permit these actions.

These actions are allowed to take place. These actions are not.

Real simple, gets to the point.

I am not fancy in this. Clowns (my term for demons) are a circus, and they are like middle schoolers. They need to be treated as such.

Your job is to not get confused with language. Your job with people who are violating and sinning is to tell them what you will and will not permit.

Now, here are some critical points on the attitude of the one walking in Matthew 18

Don’t be a jerk with your correction.
Be as gentle as you can.
Don’t mince words. Tell them the issue.
But you can do that while managing your tone.
IF you are managing your tone and they are still calling you mean, well, that is their problem.
“Restore such a one in the spirit of gentleness/temperance/meekness”. Not drunk with rage at all they have done and how vile and wicked their wickedness is.
Tell them you are interested in fixing the problem and actual reconciliation.
And for G-d’s sake do not gossip about them to the church. There is no need for you to add to someone’s sin by sinning yourself.
If you need a pastoral opinion, seek the recommendation of believers you trust to tell you who is worth talking to as a pastor.
Ask the King repeatedly, “am I doing this the right way?”
If you have questions about the process or the sequence or the attitude, ask someone you trust or who is a safe believer with sober judgment to be a sounding board and ask them to help evaluate your process.

And above all, be mindful that the King will help you. If you are intimidated by someone who has sinned against you, you might have a larger problem than this one issue. And you might want to ask why the hell you are in relationship with that person.

Be blessed.

The Twins (Already Posted To Facebook

I AM THE LORAX

The Twins….

Whenever you hear me mention “The Twins” and we are on a call together, it’s a reference to these two.

They are Basket Oaks, and while Cedar and Faye usually drop their leaves earlier in The Fall, The Twins wait till the last minute, here in late November, early December to drop their crop.

What’s more interesting for me, is that they behave mischievously for me. I will hear them laugh or chuckle or roll over in uproarious guffawing, as they remark on the bird poops and the leaves and other aspects of how they attempt to irritate or vex me. And I speak to the with love and logic, and I enjoy their reparteé.

And I do talk to, listen for, and hear plants speak with some level of understanding as to what is being said.

So many people love to tell us how preaching “the gospel to all creation” means to all Homonids.

I disagree.

πάντα τα έθνη from Matthew 28:18-20, can be taken to mean, “all the ethnic groups/nations/races”, but the longer ending of Mark 16, which says to all creation/every creature (DOT: depending on translation) uses a different word that isn’t primarily limited to the two legs with 46 chromosomes. The Greek there is κηρύξατε τὸ εὐαγγέλιον πάσῃ τῇ κτίσει “confess/preach the gospel to all the creation”.

Now, κτίσει (roughly transliterated with pronunciation as k-TEE’-say: below is the beginning for the BDAG Lexical entry for the word in question) refers to creation, “the result of a created act, creation).

And this dynamic of stewarding or managing creation means that there are those who are meant to be skilled at connecting with the land. The original design of the Druids would have included some understanding of these dynamics BEFORE their design got twisted and perverted by the enemy.

See the link below for more on this concept.

I think we are designed to have a bevy of differentiated gifts to work with ALL aspects of creation. And part of that stewardship is to interact with not just humans and preach to them, but to all the created order.and to speak of the hope of His coming and all those dynamics, and to work with the land as we build so that we do so in light of how the King wants this or that tree or bush or plant to be planted here or there, or to see a plant removed.

So, part of our late fall task is to corral the harvested crop of these two jocular arboreal teenagers and to care for them as they provide much-needed shelter for myriad birds, and to be able to hear them for what they need before they become sick and endanger property.

There are dynamics that need to be dealt with as we engage with these sorts of things. And part of what the King looks for from us, is the capacity to not only speak to those things we are ministering to, but also be able to listen for what they might say.

Be blessed, gang. And please, feel free to post as you have something you wish to discuss.

Of Flying Pianos and Feasts That are Lit

The Promenade: Pianos Will Not Fly By Themselves

It sits there, having not been used for years, and yet it is one of the few things I will not get rid of….

My upright piano.

Gotten as a gift for Chanukah a few years back, from my late wife, the Zoologist.

And yet, as it reclines there, it waits to be played, and I will spend a year learning to figure it out so that I might play it.

It is currently an unused gift. I believe this season, while I am still single and do not have a chick to annoy (the way I annoy Wendy Hibbard with the word “chick”) yet, I will do something with it.

Unused Gifts And Thresholds

And that working with unused gifts, or underused gifts, is also a threshold to consider.

A threshold being a place over which we cross from an old season to a new season. In this case, season of not playing piano, to season of learning to play (transitional season to be managed), to season of being able to play.

One gift, however, which I have not underused nearly as much, though it is not wholly unpacked, is my skill with the written word. It is part of the reason I maintain TPH. The site is a constant reminder I have an audience and people who derive some life from the things I write, not like ticks on a dog bleeding life off for survival, but more like friends out for a jaunt, enjoying the eternal adventure of sonship.

I recently discovered an aspect of my design as a writer, that, as yet, is not wholly unpacked, through the recommendation of a fellow Mercy’s blog.

If you have not discovered her blog, and are not intimidated by materialized whimsy in footnote form (I was delightfully entertained by such), Robyn McKinley’s Flying Piano sports some skillfully-wielded verbal craftsmanship in the Mercy tribe’s key of music. It reminds me of another variant of Megan Caldecourt’s Beyond The Horizon blog, itself under the cleverly-redemptive Amethyst-noted URL handle RimOfTheWorld7. And though Robyn’s and Megan’s content are a world apart, the whimsy and attention to ecosystem present themselves variously.

A friend of mine who also is connected to The Man From California, recommended her writings, and the first pair of postings hit me in that sweet linguist’s spot that evoked the sort of laughter that only my brother can evoke when we are watching Danger Mouse, or when I partake of such works as the aptly-monikered Eats, Shoots, & Leaves by Lynne Truss (her usage of the Oxford Comma notwithstanding, her work on punctuation possesses a singular wit.)

So, without adieu, gang, here is the link:

https://robinmckinleysblog.com

The Great Earth Gates of Kiev: Missed Opportunities and Unused Feasts of Christian and Believing Jewish Movements

For those not famliar, Mussgorsky’s Pictures At An Exhibition is a favorite piece of mine, and the first and third heads of this post are tied to movements of that work. “The Promenade” was the introduction to the piece and “The Great Gate of Kiev” is part of the body of that work. And given I have done some work in describing and teaching on spiritual structures like portals and earth gates….well, perhaps you will get the point.

Chanukah…

An unused feast…

Yes, in the canon of biblical text, it is only mentioned once, and then, it seems, a passing reference.

However, in our family, because of a series of events 10 years ago, the King highlighted its purpose for me and my family, and here I communicate it to y’all.

December 7, 2012, I had done something I never thought I would do ever: File for divorce. During that season from March 13 to December 7, I had completely lost my capacity for humor and laughter.

December 8, 2012, something happened though. Through the prayers of a friend from Missouri, the King had sparked a light.

And that was the first rekindling of hope in my spirit.

My laughter had returned….something really important to me…the laughter that many of y’all enjoy when we converse about any number of things.

I daresay when Hope goes missing from those who are prophetic, the effect of melancholy and despair become like unto arsenic; each new dose doubles the effect, and rushes the victim toward a most heinous end. And the joy that is needed to overcome such despair must be beyond speech, recongnition, or understanding.

That was the first night of Chanukah that year, and since then, every year, the King has given me a theme and two lynchpins for the celebration of the Feast of Dedication.

“But David, we have Sukkot. And Chanukah wasn’t commanded by the King.”

The first was John 10:22-30. To other than a “details” eye, this is a passing reference. But with the Mercy John, I would contend there is nothing passing. We Mercies, in a general place of emotional health, have a penchant, and an affection for, the understated.

At that time the Feast of Dedication took place at Jerusalem. It was winter, and Jesus was walking in the temple, in the colonnade of Solomon. So the Jews gathered around him and said to him, “How long will you keep us in suspense? If you are the Christ, tell us plainly.” Jesus answered them, “I told you, and you do not believe. The works that I do in my Father’s name bear witness about me, but you do not believe because you are not among my sheep. My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.”

John 10:22-30 ESV

What was the King doing in Jerusalem in winter walking in the Temple complex during the Feast commemorating the dedication of the temple?

I surmise he went up to Jerusalem to celebrate the recovery of the Temple Mount, and so He could point the masses to himself.

There was a dedication of the King to his Father’s purposes, and him preparing us for the dedication of our temples when we invite him in and he teaches us cause-and-effect relationships (principles), and in this season, Father gives a pair of items that color the year going forward.

Light and Truth

Justice and Mercy as the Two Facets of Love

Filter and Flow

And Sowing and Reaping

For the whimsical Exhorter G-d/Man who IS fully G-d and fully Man right now, this is a season of illumination of He himself. It’s a season of light given us by the Father of Lights.

Further, when you consider that Sukkot was when we celebrated the birth of the King (late September to early October), dial that timeframe back roughly 40 weeks and where does that place the season of His conception?

Yeah….illumination…..the spark lights the fire….thank you to the Mercy Bob Jones, for speaking to that dynamic.

That light which rains hope upon those of us which despair in this season, is the gift of His Presence to us, in us, and through us.

And for us, it is not so important that Judas Maccabaeus led a raid to retake the temple and the light stretched from one day to eight.

Rather it is a celebration of Him Who Is Light, and the One Who Reveals Reality in its Kaleidoscopic Fullness in this period, so that we can embrace our destiny and recalibrate this season to deeply redemptive purpose.

G-d was here first.

And I don’t celebrate it because unbelieving Jews reclaimed the temple. I celebrate because the Son of G-d did, and the Ben-Adonai and the Ben-Adahm used this season to tell us plainly who He was and rejected the inquiries of the religious leaders He baited with His Presence By being His Light In His Temple, which was His body, as during this season, He was REVEALING what He was doing: TENDERLY gathering His sheep who were so illuminated they could hear His voice and follow Him.

He was sowing His speech as the Word, the λόγος, and reaping the benefit of His exaltation of El Padre De Luces Del Cíelo, quien no tiene el desviación o sombro cambiante.

¡Gloria a Dios!

This is a season where the King gives our family a theme, and then He meets us as I teach on a grouping of passages during the nights of the feast.

And from year to year it varies.

As it will this year. And we will cover Galatians 6:7-9, and Psalm 95 paired with Genesis 2 and Hebrews 3 and 4, and segments of James 1, and 1 John 1, a couple of other passages where sowing and reaping are described, including Josiah and Manasseh. For what season would be complete without me showing the good thing Manasseh did while also highlighting the rebellion of Josiah.

Sowing and reaping, gang.

And the presence of His emotions can make even pianos to fly and destinies to come alive as we are reconciled to our birthrights.

So, consider deeply what He may say to you in this season, gang.

And receive His joy which will provide you strength for your destiny and journey.